The Wizard And I

If you haven't read the last post called I Got Nothing, this post here might not make perfect sense to you. My family has over the last few months or so discovered the Musical Broadway WICKED. I know some of the important parts of the story, but I haven't seen the play, so I don't know it very well at all. We all love the music from it though and listen to the cd all the time.

Sharrid and I are talking about big changes we need to make in the next year. A part of that has to do with what my dad brought up while I was home last time,...my eyes. We need to be in a better position to pursue the problem. Since I've been back home from my parents I've been thinking about it a lot more. It's because of this that the last time I listened to "The Wizard And I" from WICKED, I started crying. I now can't believe that I didn't feel the obvious connection that I have with that song. I knew most of the words before, but with my handicap on my mind, they really hit home this time, and I began to really listen to them more closely. They sure did reach deep. If you'd like to listen to the song, I have placed it at the very end of my playlist to the right.

The lyrics that really get to me are:

"This weird quirk I've tried to suppress or hide is a talent that could help me meet the Wizard"

"When I meet the Wizard, what I've waited for since...since birth"
"Once I'm with the Wizard, my whole life will change, cause once you're with the Wizard, no one thinks you're strange"

"And this gift or this curse I have inside, maybe at last I'll know why, when we are hand in hand, the Wizard and I"

"Shouldn't a girl whose so good inside have a matching exterior? And since folks here to an absurd degree seem so fixated on your verdigris, would it be alright by you if I de-greenify you?" (I thought of de-blindify you actually...it almost makes me laugh when I'm crying)

"And though of course that's not important to me "all right, why not!" I'll reply" (This only makes sense if you listen to the way she sings it. I relate to the way she sings this, even though it's very important to me...you just have to listen.)

"Unlimited, my future is unlimited, and I've just had a vision almost like a prophecy, I know - it sounds truly crazy, and true the vision's hazy but I swear someday there'll be a celebration throughout Oz that's all to do with me!"

"And I'll stand there with the Wizard feeling things I've never felt, and though I'd never show it, I'll be so happy I could melt! And so it will be for the rest of my life and I'll want nothing else til I die, held in such high esteem, when people see me they will scream!"

All of this made me think of something I've written. It's one of the only things I've written that is actually about myself, although I've written a lot of stuff. It's from one of the first poems I ever wrote. It's only one stanza from the actual poem, but I thought I'd share it.

All of my life
I've never known what it's like
To see such things as you do
To see such things, it is true
But even with this hard test
How can I not feel I'm blessed?
I know I'll give all my best
Even at times I am stressed
And then someday I'll be healed
And I will fall down and kneel
And thank my father above
For his great mercy and love
I can see all this now
But I will never know how
To tell you what I've been through
So I will leave it to you

Welcome to my life
I've taken it with strife
I've dealt with it just fine
It isn't yours it's mine
But welcome to my life
Yes, welcome to my life